Posted by Tat on December 26, 1999 at 20:49:48:

In Reply to: You might not like my opinion. I don't believe that actions should be in a desc. posted by Pendragon_Surtr on December 12, 1999 at 21:56:13:

> > You turn around to see a tall, thin, man.

> But what if I didn't want to turn around?

> It seems odd that you did not hear
> > him enter the room until you notice his ears.

> Room? I am in the middle of the forest!

>
> Your jaw drops open and your
> > eyes stare for the elven kind are seldom seen.

> Seldom seen? But I standing in the forests of Mirkwood. There are elves all over here.

> His skin is pale, much like
> > that of a human. His hair is unlike anything you have ever seen before. It
> > is deep blue, as the rivers in Thera once were.

> This is ok, except for the part about "unlike anything you have ever seen before." You would have no idea what I have or haven't seen before.

>
> He glances up in the sky and
> > his eyes glow bright white.

>
> So everytime I look at you, you have to glance up at the sky? What if I look at you as you are sleeping?

> As he tips his head slightly forward you sense
> > that there is a great power being channeled through him.

> Again, you are tipping your head in your sleep?

>
> He opens his hand
> > to you, asking that you take it so he may give you his aid.

>
> You are offering to aid me? But what if I am a dark elf? With this line a dark elf could ask you for your aid, do you really want that?

> He smiles at you
> > and then he is gone again, in the blink of an eye.

>
> And lastly, everytime someone looks at you you word or teleport? Kinda tough doing that.
> I know you asked for suggestions, I will post some tomorrow, I don't have the time to do up a decent description right now.

Follow Ups:

• True, especially since "nearby" doesn't have a space in it. (TEXT) Pendragon_Surtr 00:31:16 12/30/99 (1)
  • Ilobel, please read. Pendragon_Surtr 00:35:43 12/30/99 (0)

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